You

You’re my fourth wall, my writers block,
The one unreachable note. You scribble me
Down like an afterthought and forget later
What it was you wrote. And I like the fool
I can be, sit back and watch you make the
Thought of me some kind of joke, while I
Choke, on love.

My hands are rough now from trying to
Build you up every time you say you’re knocked
Down, try to make a smile from that frown.
I should know by now that the stage doesn’t matter-
The ending, I hear the sound, of the curtain fall
And you, you’ve played your part beautifully,
The philosophical clown.

And I expect too much, from you, from me
And the perfect mess we could be. Its
So foolish to think, that we could share the stars,
Wrong to believe, that I have any idea
Who or what exactly it is that you are.
Time to throw the net out again
And wade into the sea.

Miles and Miles

Is does not matter how you arrive there
Nor if the hour is late or the sky dark.
Silence or sound has no importance
Are you aware?
Of the flickering message that I sent?
Have you seen
The miles and miles that stretch between?

Your heavy head rested on the windowpane
The conversation flowed…
Then ebbed away.
Your father glanced at you again and again
But you could find nothing to say.

You dreamt of the visions you were to see,
Your peaceful face and closed eyes smiled.
Filling your mind with things unrelated to me,
While I dreamt of broken rings.

In your dream
Were there miles and miles in between?
Will you ever see
The miles
And miles
That stretch between?

Source of Light

Standing with my back to the sun.
Its heat, burning. Unable to turn
Around for the fear of the warmth
That will not last. Glowing,shining,
Illuminating light source. Do not
Grow dim on me. Mist and cloud
Enviable.But-
Please.
If I am to savour this one moment,
Let me know in advance when it may
End.
I can grasp for my umbrella and shelter
From the storm.
Protected.

Thoughts from a Dormant Mind

I don’t know it’s just
The cold and the chill.
The cramping in my right leg at night,
Connecting to my hand making
Everything tremor.

It’s just
The part of me that looks
At the sea of faces and wants to detach.
Fresh air. Your face and your hair
And the kerb beneath us. Support.

And coffee
To heat a cold body and awake
A sleeping heart. You’re away.
Forget the crying in front of strangers,
Its’s over.

I dream of fields, the air,sun.
Your hand and my eyes looking at
You from underneath a hat.
I feel the ending of one time
And inhale freedom.

Plant Food

Plant Food

The carnations are still blooming,
But the scent fades by the day.
The giver of such beauty
Intends, I think
To stay.

I struggle.
Breath trying to escape my worn out
lips.
Something coarsing through my veins
That is not blood.
A moment and it.. slips
away.

I cant remember you.
Cant see what your face once was.
I fight to go back,
Enjoy you in the past.
Something my mind lacks,
Nothing lasts.